quick!

Hi! Just a quick note before I leave for Hueco Tanks, TX:

The cure for grief is motion.

I miss my Uncle, the holidays always make me super emotional. So I'm packing up, heading out, ready to experience a place that meant so much to my Uncle and my family in general.

This is my motion.

This is my get away.

This is my gift to myself.

I'm ready to explore.

Ready to be emotionally exhausted...

but yet, so filled at the same time.

I'm ready to laugh until I cry and make new inside jokes with some of my favorite people in the world.

Get ready, get set, love.

Merry Chrismahanukwanzakah!

Hello to everyone! I am in an especially cheerful mood today because I received a NEW camera!! Dirt free and ready to see the world, this camera, a canon rebel xti, is ready to be my poetry to the universe. Get ready because we are stepping it up! (hopefully.)

What are you celebrating today? Here are some things that I'm celebrating:

-Jesus's birthday. The dude was way cool, happy birthday Jesus.

-My family- they are better and more than I ever deserved.

-My friends- hey thanks for stopping by and taking the time to read my thoughts...you all are what make my world turn so thank you :)

-My puppy- she got a new bed today and is happily curled up in a ball, sleeping on fluffy stuff in her kennel.

-My new camera. Hey, I am psyched, it is the best and I can't wait to see the world through a new lense (take that back...two new lenses, my dad got me another one)

-the fact that my life is so brilliant. Filled with amazing people, a new CAR *forgot to mention that one* to go on adventures with and so many opportunities. The world is opening up its arms to you too- just listen.

Here are some photos. Some old, some new, some red, some blue (just kidding about that last part. There will be no red and blue photos...sorry).

this is my brother. He is the best. To be honest, he's more than the best.mandatory ornament shot.you, you have the key to my heart.with welcoming arms.the stories behind our eyes.

recently...

whoa.

life has seemed to have been put into overdrive, and things have been zooming by. My team and I have been finishing up the grant proposal for Chile and I'm hoping to send it in by today. How scary is that?! This has been in the works for 2 months maybe? So much time and effort put into this, and knowing that as soon as we send it off, it is out of our hands brings on a bunch of emotions for me. Some of those include: hopefulness, amazement, excitement, and a tad bit of "oh boy."

Yesterday I got to go on an adventure in downtown Denver! Two of my great friends and I woke up early, wayyy earlier than I wanted...but in order to get the good light, I was willing to sacrifice sleep. The day was filled of lots of laughter, many times laughter came at inappropriate times but that just made it even better. It was also filled with lots of "wait! no that alley didn't look too sketchy- go back!"

My brain is drained from editing the grant proposal, researching Chile and running around to find the right looking shots. Christmas is coming soon and I am eagerly awaiting Friday morning to come so I can melt down into my sweatshirt and watch the castle of gifts around the tree slowly come apart, brick by brick. The clouds are even looking like they are going to drop some snowflakes on us. That would be wonderful.

some of the favorites from the day:

maybe

You were restless

I was somewhere less secure

So I went running to the road

And so now there's

A long list of places I was

I quit my rambling and I came home

Cause maybe I was born to hold you in these arms

Maybe I was born to hold you in these arms

taking the keys and running.

so it was getting boring at home yesterday, i have spent way too much time on my computer editing things for Chile, and not enough time with my dog. My mom agreed to take care of Veda for the day if I wanted to go somewhere...so I took the keys and ran towards the mountains. There was something about driving towards the big flatirons with my favorite songs turned up too loud that just helped me breathe.

So I settled in Boulder for the night, climbed till my muscles hurt, sung in the car until I lost my voice and got about 6 hours of bad sleep. It was great.

The rest of the day eventually became more rushed, running from place to place. chaos. not fun.

On a separate note, I need some vitamin B. I need to have more sunlight in my system. And since it is currently dark outside, I am hoping that I can vicariously get some sunlight through these pictures. Wish for warm weather and summer to come soon.

Photo adventure soon. Be excited for coming photos.

two peas in a pod.

flying, zooming, coasting.

the jungle dog, yawning as she scouts for things to chase.

check out that vitamin b sun rays. miss it.

the road less traveled by.

wishing you lots of sun.

babies and soul bursting

hey, hello, hi.

I want to take a minute and just start off by saying how ridiculously awesome life is sometimes. Today, I got to see my friend Mandy. Mandy is older than I am, and used to be a camp counselor for a backpacking camp I used to go to. It's been about 5 years since I have seen her, due to the fact that we both live incredibly busy lives! Between her getting married, joining and leaving to Ecuador for the Peace Corps and then coming back and having a kid, we had a lot to catch up on. I'm amazed at the things she is doing in her life, I am so thankful to have her as such an awesome role model. Mandy is hands down one of the most genuine people I know and she is

definitely someone I try to be more like. Her babe, Edith, came along for the ride to meet me

too! Edith is 5 months old and adorable.

So needless to say, it was a wonderful afternoon of eating, talking, loving life and this baby. It got me thinking how incredible it is to love unconditionally. To love, no matter what the situation. Life just hits you sometimes and its great to take a step back and decide to just love.

Maybe you are aware, maybe you aren't, but I was once told that having your heart breaking because of sadness and having your heart burst because of happiness is the same feeling. The amount of 'x' emotion that fills up your soul and either makes you a)cry or b) laugh/jump up and down/ smile until your face hurts is the same feeling, but just different emotions.

This made me think of two situations in my life:

The feeling of having your heart burst because of sadness. When my uncle passed away, that was something that I thought I would never get over. I haven't necessarily gotten over it but I have accepted it. For days upon weeks upon months my heart honestly hurt. And I would have moments where my soul was filled up with sadness and there was absolutely nothing I could do but let it in. So I would cry, I would remember what made me sad and I would let the grief completely take over and melt. But after I cried, I would get up, do something proactive with all the emotions and i would be better. Those were days that I didn't think would end, but the consistency of those feelings went away. Now I am able to accept that he isn't here and it still makes me sad, it still makes me cry, but the amount of people that have come into my life because of it is more positive than I could have ever imagined. He is someone that I love to talk about, I love to think about and laugh about things that he used to do. From this situation, I found out how many people care about me and my family. It is really unbelievable.

which leads me to my next part:

There are sometimes that my soul is filled up with so much happiness that there's nothing I can do but cry. Or dance around my room. Or recently, Veda and I have jumped on the bed. (we can't do that at my bed at school because it is up about 4 ft and I would hit my head and V would fall off) Throughout the more recent course of my life, people have opened doors for me. I don't really know why, other than I am guessing it is because they sincerely care about the things I do with my life. I won't name the 10+ opportunities that have come across my life path lately, but I will tell you there has been a lot of Veda and I dancing around my room.

I can only hope that I will influence someone's life as Mandy has influenced mine.

I can only hope that I can give someone young opportunities when I have some experience under my belt.

I can only hope that your soul bursts in a good way, and when it bursts in sadness, that you realize that it will be better tomorrow, it won't always be as heart wrenching. But until then, do something proactive with the emotions.

Happy tuesday, my friends.

website!

The website is up and running! So exciting!!

www.beccaskinner.com

It was a great deal of investment (such as time and money), but it will be worth it. I'm sure. Now that school is out, I am focusing most of my time on researching indigenous tribes in Chile. I am learning more about South American geography, culture and history than I ever thought possible.

Even if this project does not go through, the amount of networking I have done and friendships that I have established throughout the process would be worth it. There is a huge 'thank-you' owed to those people who have spent endless hours talking with individuals from our team; anyone who was willing to give us the time to talk about the project proposal and just listen to our ideas has been more of a help than anything we could have imagined.

Since I have arrived at home in Denver, there has been lots of music in the house. My mom went back to school for a Music Education degree (I am grinning ear to ear, I am so proud of her) and she brings home lots of interesting instruments. My sister has been singing a lot, and I brought home my guitar. There is something about sitting down and spending time harmonizing, writing, creating, and loving every minute that makes my soul fill up. It makes me think back to summer and spending late nights on the porch in Lander, teaching myself to play guitar and creating music while the porch lights are hung up like it's Christmas; the wind picking up, and carrying late night concerts at the bar and scents like rain.

Bub takin in the sun rays

finalmente!

So happy to be done with finals.

finally.

in one sense, it is sad because it is over, it seems like only when something like this is done, does it seem like it went quickly. I can remember the first day moving into my house, the first time I cooked an entire meal for myself in the house, and many memories in between. Isn't it funny that something that once seemed so new and different is now so comfortable?

Now I can fully concentrate on the Patagonia adventure that will hopefully take place sooner than later. *fingers crossed*

Aside from anything relevant, here are some old photos. They were taken by Mike Mills this past year in Bishop; Mike really has some brilliant photos and I feel like he doesn't share them with the world enough. I did some editing (sorry Mike) and thought that there were some cool ones to share of me climbing...and now that I typed that, it sounds vain. To make up for it, I will post plenty of other photos of people climbing in my upcoming trip to Hueco Tanks, TX after christmas. It should be wonderful :)

de-stress.

So stressed out.

Between trying to plan this patagonia trip and finals, I think I've started growing grey hair and probably gaining some age wrinkles around my eyes. No jokes here.

So to de-stress myself out, I danced around the room as best i could to this:

I loved deeper.

I kissed my pup, and we played fetch for 20 minutes.

I made myself wheat pancakes, with strawberries, and whipped cream for breakfast/lunch.

that made things better.

I still had the same amount of work to do, but i did some important things to make sure I was in the right mindset.

I encourage you to dance around the room

to eat pancakes for lunch

and dinner

and breakfast

but mostly, i encourage you to take time out of your schedule to do more important things.

sending you all big hugs,

b.

the attic, finally a post about rock climbing.

The best climbing gym in Laramie is about the size of a dorm room. There are no specific problems, just a whole bunch of holds on 3 walls of different angles. I wish I could describe to you, how the brick walls freeze in the winter time and its about 20 degrees in this little place until you turn on the heater, which makes it about 35 degrees. and I wish I could describe to you how the floor is all crash pads, and foam so when you fall, you bounce. And I wish I could accurately describe the holds on the wall, its like being in a candy shop; all the colors and shapes, just ready to throw you off the wall and rub it in your face; taunting you that you aren't strong enough to hold on. Yet.Every week there is a group of us that goes in to The Source,

turns up the reggae or the rap all the way, and huck ourselves at plastic shapes in hopes of catching them to build our muscles.

This gym is a coop and survives solely on members paying for their keys each month. I love this community.

nori working out the moves of a problem

t'was a project

nori being strong

working on a problem

nori picking out the tunage. Probably State Radio or Atmosphere

This picture is by Alli Rainey, she came through Laramie this summer. Quality person. Quality session.

*NOTE that these pictures were taken during the summer time...it looks like this during the winter time but everyone is wearing down jackets and showing as little skin as possible.

pictures for thoughts

some of the recents.

so pleased with the outcome.

hey annalissa, recognize the dress?

prove it.

you say all these words,

some that i don't believe anymore.

prove it.

fear.

recently, i have been discussing life with a lot of people. Not exactly a whole lot of context, but more the subject of.Today, I witnessed someone have a seizure in one

of my classes. Needless to say, it was an absolutely terrifying experience, for her too I'm sure. It seemed like forever until someone decided that she needed to be off her chair and on the ground. Even though its not fatal, it still is an absolutely scary part of life.

It made me think about how much we are controlled by fear.

And fear includes not saying something when you want to. So, say it now.

Fear includes not doing something you love. Whether it be because of someone else's opinion, your own thoughts, or something deeper, don't let it control you

Fear includes (for me) not being prepared. So after class got out early, I scooted to the library and researched what to do when someone has a seizure. That way, next time, if something like that happens again, I will be prepared.

And most of all, do not, do not, do NOT be afraid to fall in love.

fall in love, be in love, stay in love and it will decide everything.

love,

b

winding down, gearing up.

oh goodness. where to begin. Things are winding up here in Laramie for the semester, I'm psyched to get out of here and start my life for a month without school. And plus, its -8 degrees here. not ok. I'm realizing the more I get older that the cold weather makes me feel awful. Its all the lack of sun. But luckily, I got plenty of 5 degree sun today walking home for 30 minutes. Not having a car is turning into a major issue. false, it is a major issue. I am crossing my fingers for a car around christmastime.

Other things in my life: finals. who the hell thought it was a good idea to have a cumulative test at the end of the year to make sure you were paying attention? yeah. again, not ok. I am banking on passing all of my classes with the exception of one. But i've

been busting my butt to pull up that grade. I think it was due to skipping two weeks of class to go on tour with the North Face. Oh well, the trade off with all the networking I did on tour was well worth skipping school and failing class. psh.

I want to take a minute to thank you all for reading. And for putting up with my countless pictures, my endless photo albums, et cetera. I sincerely appreciate all the comments, the questions, and all that jazz. It makes it easier to get out of bed in the morning.

What gets you out of bed in the morning?

My list:

-veda, she has to eat and pee. so i guess that's a pretty legitimate reason to get up.

-food, i'm hungry in the mornings most days and i have delicious granola.

-my friends, my core group of individuals that help my world turn. These are the people that I talk to frequently or everyday, you know, the ones that drop you notes just to say that they love you, and know what you need when you have a bad day. th

ose are truly the people that I try to surround myself with.

-even though i despise the cold, i like the snow when I'm warm. It glitters and it is crunchy. I can't think of anything else that can be both of those at the same time.

And plus, my room is the best. Maybe I will post pictures at a l

ater date in time. Lets just say its painted orange and I have the best futon on the planet for me and my pup to sleep on.

Anyways, here are some oldie pictures. found them, edited a little bit, but Mei demanded I put some up. So here you go chica: